Duration: 18’ 25’’
Support: projection with sound
November 2021
Joya:AiR Art Residency, Andalusia, Spain

Coming out of my mother’s womb. I do what I feel, time passes and the mind is busy trying to understand what hands do. It leaves them free and they develop a natural technique that is prohibited to adults. I grow up, but something broke. First crack. Flooded by notions I leave behind hands and shocked by the bulimia of information my body stays inert and knocked unconscious. It keeps on jumping like when someone shoots a dead body. The movement is passive. Second crack. Build an armour they said. You’ll be stronger. So taking inspiration from what I had stuck in my throat because of them, I built a carapace of apparent knowledge. But the body calls. This is a fracture. An unexpected crack. Like when the water flows inside tiles’ joints and when you think that it is going to happen inside the right one, it goes left instead. This wasn’t supposed to happen. But it happens. Third crack. So I walk. I walk with this armour that is heavy like the whole world. I can’t find peace. I can’t find rest. I can’t find. But I walk. The more they want me inert, the more I walk. Until I find out what I really need. Survival needs little things. I wear off the armour and I let go outside what’s inside, something that is powerful and strong enough to unblock that stopper that is stuck under my epiglottis. Another unexpected crack. I am vulnerable. I am a bit more free. I am vulnerable and a bit more free. It’s a lot of confusion. There are no handles, like in the cave. I hear that voice that tells me that I have to stay still, to go back. I am giving up. I can’t do that. Complexity is not for me. They told me. But this time it is. I won’t listen to you anymore. We always wear a mask. But we still have the power to decide if we want to wear the one that hides or the one that shows.

These are some of the words that flows interrupted by long moments of silence and coming from the inside. Thoughts are made in a moment of solitude during an art residency at Joya:AiR in Andalucia, Spain. The strong impact with nature forces to face the body and to think about social constructs that are part of western culture. European instruction doesn’t deal with the physical body and with the “selvatico” that is in every human being, instead it tends to tame it. But sooner or later “the body calls” and everything that contributed to anesthetize the essence it’s not strong enough to stop that animal and disruptive power. “SELVATICA” is a never-ending fight for freedom.